“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:”
Ecclesiastes 3:1“a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;”
Ecclesiastes 3:4
One moment, you are a huge part of someone’s whole world, and that someone is one of your parents, my Dad. The next moment, I am watching that same person slowly fade into memory, and I find myself constantly trying to make sure his life is remembered and treasured.
Grieving my Dad is difficult. I miss him every day, and I wish things could have been different. Yet I also rejoice, knowing he is in the presence of God in heaven.
Grieving is a hard trial to endure. We hear of tragic events every day. People lose loved ones they cherish, and it brings deep sadness. But when someone is a believer, a follower of Christ, we take comfort in knowing they are in heaven with God.
Still, it is one thing to hear of someone else’s loss, and another thing entirely to experience it yourself. It is hard to grasp the sorrow of losing someone you love while also rejoicing that they are with Jesus in perfect peace, free from pain and suffering.
I believe we should grieve with an eternal purpose: to grieve and be sad because we will not see our loved one again on this earth, yet to rejoice knowing they are presently in heaven, at peace and whole.
Facing the Reality of Death
Death forces us to face a reality we often try to forget. We want to focus on the present, not the ending. Yet grieving someone you love changes you. It reshapes your perspective and reminds you of your true purpose: to live for Christ, knowing that one day we will spend eternity in heaven.
It also reminds us what is most important in this life.
I grew up knowing the importance of the gospel: how Jesus died for my sins so that I might have eternal life if I believe in Him. John 3:16 was a verse I knew from a young age. Even before I became a Christian, I understood the sacrifice Jesus made for sinners.
As a child, I often worried about losing a parent. I did not realize that fear would remain even into adulthood. Losing my Dad the way I did made me realize that the grief we carry is rooted in love. We grieve because we loved deeply, and we feel the weight of a life now changed.
Parents are our constant. They raise us, teach us, care for us, support us.
Losing a parent is a grief I know I will carry for the rest of my life. Yet it is also a reminder of where I came from, and the joy of knowing I will see my Dad again in heaven.
To grieve is to carry forward the love that person showed us while they were here on earth.
The Last Words
“I love you Dad I’ll see you tomorrow.”
These were the last words I said to my Dad the final night I visited him in the hospital, not knowing it would be the last time I would see him alive. I remember feeling him try to squeeze my hand.
No matter what truly happened that day, I will always cherish that moment as our last together. His love was always shown to me, even in the saddest of times.
Attending a funeral for someone you merely knew is very different from attending the funeral of someone whose whole world included you. I did not understand that difference until I sat at my Dad’s funeral, watching the service I helped plan unfold.
When I was a child, I could be dramatic and upset over small things, normal for a selfish child wanting her own way. My Dad would say, “crying is for when someone dies.” Though spoken in a specific context, those words stayed with me. We cry because grief is real.
The Day He Passed
The day my Dad passed away was one of the saddest days of my life. Everything felt heavy. His passing felt sudden, even though we knew things were not improving. We still held a glimmer of hope. We prayed and begged God for change, for even one more conversation.
That day returns to me in flashes: the chaos, the sadness, the planning we were not prepared for. Yet through it all, I felt God’s presence with us. He is always with us.
I am thankful for the ways God shows He will care for us, even in the hardest and saddest moments.
“Sometimes mid scenes of deepest gloom,
Sometimes where Eden’s flowers bloom,
by waters calm, o’er troubled sea,
still ‘tis God’s hand that leadeth me.”
— Joseph H. Gilmore, 1862
Grieving with an eternal purpose is what allows life to keep moving forward, a bittersweet sorrow that misses our loved one while trusting they have been called to their true home with Jesus.
“His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant…Enter into the joy of your master.’”
Matthew 25:21
The Hope of Eternity
As I grow older, it becomes harder to understand how someone can be here today and gone tomorrow. I was fortunate not to attend many funerals when I was young.
“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more…”
Revelation 21:4
One day we will experience eternity with Jesus: no pain, no suffering, no tears, no trials. God is faithful and keeps His promises. These truths help us keep moving forward, especially on the days we miss our loved ones most.
Reflection
When you face loss and God does not feel near, will you continue to trust Him?
Trials draw us closer to God. Life can feel unfair. The Christian life is hard. At times it feels like we are knocked down and cannot rise again.
Do you sense God guiding you?
“Fear not, for I am with you…I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Isaiah 41:10
The Christian Faith and Final Hope
I miss my Dad every day. I wonder what might have been different: what he would be doing today, the holidays and birthdays he has missed. It is a strange and painful reality that I will not see him again on this side of heaven.
Yet I can cherish his memory and the way he sought to live for Christ. I can pray and know God is near as I continue to live according to His will.
Grief is ongoing, but we grieve with eternal purpose, knowing we will one day see our loved ones again with Jesus.
“Be still, and know that I am God.”
Psalm 46:10
One of my favorite memories is hearing my Dad sing this song during family gatherings and devotions. It was one of his favorites. I know my Dad is now with Jesus in heaven.
Until We Meet Again
Dear Dad, until we meet again, I love you forever. I cannot wait to be reunited with you in heaven, where we will worship God together for all eternity.
“Savior, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever Author of salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave” —Laura Story
